“To conquer frustration, one must remain intensely focused on the outcome, not the obstacles.” ― T.F. Hodge

How to Deal With Frustration?

Abhishek Shah
5 min readMar 30, 2021

“This is so frustrating!”

If you say that more often than you would like, then you must do something about it.

We all know the feeling of frustration and it is not a single bit pleasing. We get frustrated over several things and in worse situations, if all of them happen together then hell breaks loose. We are frustrated when we are falling short to meet our goals or when someone else is failing to meet the needs. In short, things are simply not working out and in worse situations, we might not even know why.

This feeling of frustration is a weird blend of stress and anger that makes us emotionally active and we react to things that would have never affected us otherwise. If you are frustrated, it not only drains you out but also has a negative effect on the people around you. And in the middle of this suffering, if someone tells you to calm down or to introspect over the reasons which lead to your frustration, it might simply get on your nerves. Even though recognizing the sources that trigger your frustration is a great way to cope up with it, in some situations it just gets impossible.

So, if you find yourself to be stressed out, less patient, more emotional, and in a nutshell, you describe the whole feeling as frustration then you should try some of the below 14 ways to get rid of your frustration quickly.

  1. Cry. Life gets rough sometimes and a good cry is all that you need to feel better. Let it all out with a healthy cry.
  2. Scream. It goes pretty much like crying but you are just too loud here. Go to an isolated place and scream your heart out. But wrap it up in a minute or two because you don’t want people to call on cops.
  3. Go for a run. Take some time and burn the frustration. Those friendly endorphins will make you feel much better after the run.
  4. Grab a Drink. Yes, an alcoholic one. You don’t need to get drunk but just grab one drink, anything that you like, and relax as your nerves calm down. But if you swear by being non-alcoholic then drink few glasses of water or your favorite
  5. Hit the Gym or do some Zumba. If it is too cold to go outside for a run, then go to your community gym to lift some weights or even better do some exercise at home, any kind of exercise that you like. Simple yoga or stretching your body also does great miracles.
  6. Put on some Angry Music. Play some rock music or those Eminem songs to just let out the steam. Do some head-banging along. Create a playlist and keep it for such times.
  7. Talk to someone. This is my personal favorite. Call up your friend, your mother, or talk to your partner because venting out feels good. But don’t call someone who is a bad listener.
  8. Eat. Munch on some cookies, chips, or your favorite ice-cream and eat your heart out.
  9. Watch a funny video/movie. Get far away from your feeling of frustration by watching some funny videos on YouTube or a good comedy movie. ‘Friends’ is one of my favorite sitcoms and when things are not working out, that’s what I watch. Even those silly cat videos work great, believe me.
  10. Write it down. Just pen down your feelings. Anything and everything that you are feeling at the moment and whatever you think caused You are not writing for your language exams so don’t worry about grammar and vocabulary.
  11. Type an angry text. If you have forgotten how to write sentences with a pen (trust me that happens), then just type it all out in a text. You don’t need to send it to anyone but it just feels good to get the words out.
  12. Draw it. You don’t like words but you like to draw then do it. It need not be meaningful, just keep scribbling till you feel you are back to your normal self.
  13. Punch something. If you have a punching bag, then great! Use it. If you don’t have it, use your pillow. I don’t advocate violence but there is nothing like the frustration release that comes from this exercise.
  14. Take deep breaths. You have surely seen the movies where the doctor recommends women in labor to take deep breaths. Yes, that works. Breathing is the easiest thing that you can do without costing you or anyone anything. Take slow and deep breaths. Repeat this four to six times and just cool down.

Once you are back to normal and have relaxed, zoom out from the situation and try to look at it from different perspectives. It will make you realize if there were ways in which you could have avoided the frustration altogether. And if there were, then make a note of them so that the same reason does not get you frustrated once again, because who likes to be the nasty person people like to stay away from. And if things still haven’t improved then bookmark this article and revisit it when you are frustrated again.

Suggested Reading!

1. Overcoming Life’s Disappointments: Learning from Moses How to Cope with Frustration

2. In Control: No More Snapping at Your Family, Sulking at Work, Steaming in the Grocery Line, Seething in Meetings, Stuffing your Frustration

3. Propelled: How Boredom, Frustration, and Anticipation Lead Us to the Good Life

4. Unfuck Your Anger: Using Science to Understand Frustration, Rage, and Forgiveness (5-Minute Therapy)

5. The Frustrated Leader: Using Frustration To Accomplish Your Vision

6. The Anger Trap: Free Yourself from the Frustrations that Sabotage Your Life

As always, let me know your thoughts on the topic. I’d love to hear your ideas and views in the comments below.

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Abhishek Shah

Nomad | Early Stage Investor | Wannabe Anthropologist | Technology Evangelist | Curious, Inquisitive & Experimental Entrepreneur